JEAN PAUL

This morning I take my computer to Ventura and face the findings – my documents are gone or not gone. I haven’t inventoried what I may have lost yet. I’ll wait for the verdict. I feel so much in acceptance now, that I’m calm. That’s God working in me because I keep talking to God. I don’t really understand the need for actual conversation with God, but it seems to be a real need. Possibly because I’m human. I wouldn’t think of having a partner I knew was loving, loyal and fun and not have conversation. Talking with God is not something I’ve ever done much of until fairly recently, the past couple years, and especially the past few weeks. That is, ever since I finished reading Tracy Chevalier’s novel The Virgin Blue. What happened was, one day when I was vexed with my partner, I asked God what should I do. God responded in the kind, amused voice of the novel’s love interest Jean Paul: “Maybe do nothing do nothing, for now.”  I was so surprised to hear God talk in the voice of Jean Paul I laughed out loud. I did as he suggested, nothing, and after a few hours all of my angst was gone. I was able to see my part in things, see life for what it is, big and deep, and go make up. Well, I’ll get through this computer debacle and will have learned my lesson – always save to a flash drive and to an external backup. I had stopped saving because One Drive was grabbing everything and I didn’t know what to do about that.  

PS. The computer guys were able to save all of my documents and to disconnect One Drive. Also, I ask God, “Are you still there?” I hear Jean Paul’s kind amused voice say, “Of course!”

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